Tuesday, August 11, 2009

H1N1....affects you whether you like it or not!

Be it H1N1 or not, now is a very bad time to get sick. All clinics are packed!

long...long....long....queue!If normally the good doctor will try to explain what was wrong with you, now he is only need to say "No, it is not H1N1"

or

"You need to go to GH............... NOWWWW!!'

Definitions - Part 2

Conference Room
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on
Father
A banker provided by nature
Criminal
A person no different from the rest ....except that he/she got caught
Boss
Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early
Politician
One who shakes your hand before elections
DOCTOR
A person who holds your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.
Smile
A curve that can set a lot of things straight.
Office
A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.
Yawn
The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.
Etc.
A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.
Committee
Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.
Experience
The name men give to their mistakes.
Atom Bomb
An invention to end all inventions.
Philosopher
A fool who torments himself during life, to be wise

H1N1 - 32 deaths but still no SOP?

NST: "The Education Ministry will issue a standard operating procedure (SOP) on closure of schools where pupils are affected by influenza A (H1N1). "



It is really shocking to hear the Deputy Minister of Education said that only now he is planning to have a SOP for schools closure!


"This is why we are calling for officers from both ministries to meet and come up with a proper guideline or SOP when calling for closure of a school where its students are affected by the H1N1 virus."



Only now that he is planning to get officers form his minister to sit down with officers from Health Minister! Why now? Why not earlier when there was no death? Why you must until 32 deaths? Why?

Where have you been all these while,Mr Minister ?

Saturday, August 8, 2009

Definitions - Part 1

School
A place where Parents pay and children play

Life Insurance
A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.

Nurse
A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.

Marriage
It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.

Divorce
Future tense of Marriage.

Tears
The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.

Lecture
An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either
"

Conference
The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.
Compromise
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody b elie ves he got the biggest piece

4 things that tell a lot of things!

You can tell a lot about a person by the way he/she handles four things:
1. a rainy day,
2. the elderly,
3. lost luggage,
and
4. tangled Christmas tree lights.

A Bird In The Hand,

.....is better than TWO in the bushes...................literally!


Friday, August 7, 2009

A Wooden Bowl

A frail old man went to live with his son, daughter-in-law, andfour-year-old grandson.The old man's hands trembled, his eyesight was blurred, and his step faltered.

The family ate together at the table. But the elderly grandfather'sshaky hands andfailing sight made eating difficult. Peas rolled off his spoon onto the floor.When he grasped the glass, milk spilled on the tablecloth.

The son and daughter-in-law became irritated with the mess.'We must do something about father,' said the son.'I've had enough of his spilled milk, noisy eating, and food on the floor.'
So the husband and wife set a small table in the corner.There, Grandfather ate alone while the rest of the family enjoyed dinner.Since Grandfather had broken a dish or two, his food was served in a wooden bowl.

When the family glanced in Grandfather's direction, sometimes he had atear in his eye as he sat alone.Still, the only words the couple had for him were sharp admonitionswhen he dropped a fork or spilled food.

The four-year-old watched it all in silence.

One evening before supper, the father noticed his son playing withwood scraps on the floor.He asked the child sweetly, 'What are you making?' Just as sweetly,the boy responded,'Oh, I am making a little bowl for you and Mama to eat your food inwhen I grow up..' The four-year-old smiled and went back to work.
The words so struck the parents so that they were speechless. Then tears started to stream down their cheeks. Though no word was spoken,both knew what must be done.

That evening the husband took Grandfather's hand and gently led himback to the family table.For the remainder of his days he ate every meal with the family. And for some reason,neither husband nor wife seemed to care any longer when a fork was dropped, milk spilled, or the tablecloth soiled.